American Idol -- Billboard #1s

Every week, Simon tells contestants that they need to make themselves more relevant. In keeping with that opinion, how about one week they make a theme that isn't a song from the year you were born or songs from bands old enough to be your grandfathers or #1 songs from other centuries. Here's an idea. Make them pick a song by an artist that's the same age? There's contemporary and, hopefully, relevant.

On to my opinion of tonight's performances and show.

Was that Lee DeWyze doing The Letter? Or, did the spirit of Joe Cocker possess Michael Buble? Weird, I know, but it worked I actually liked that performance and am becoming more of a Lee fan every week.

Ellen, you know how like you start out making some weird comparison between a contestant and like unripe bananas or favorite pens and then go on and on and on until we all like want to stab you with that freaking favorite pen? Well stop. Just stop.

Paige, it isn't enough to stay in tune, you also need to stay in time with the band. Not only couldn't you hold the pitch, you either sang ahead of or behind the music. I think we were taking a good look at your swan song. It's against all odds that you'll still be around next week.

When Randy sucks air in between his teeth, brace yourself for a bad critique. Paige's performance was so bad that even Ellen had to pull a Paula and tell her she looked beautiful.

Tim doing Queen? I was already cringing before he sang a note. He was like your drunken misfit brother grabbing the mic and signing at your wedding. The only thing that can save him is that Paige sucked worse.

I really wish we could text in votes for who we want to see leave. I'd blow my entire month's plan on two contestants tonight.

Could Aaron have a bigger crush on Miley Cyrus?? That not Ellen's unripe banana in his pocket when he hugged her.

Apparently, I'm the only one who didn't adore Crystal's performance and I LOVE her. Maybe the judges were just so happy to have someone A) sing on pitch and B) not make an idiot of him/herself that they went overboard. Don't get me wrong, she wasn't awful just okay.

Mike played it very safe but he'll still be around next week.

Andrew, you know you're not gonna make it to the top when you get outsung by a bunch of claymation raisins.

Thanks to Katie, we finally heard a song from this century. For some reason, Katie brings out the hate in some of my friends. (And you know who you are, Jane!) I like her and thought this was one of her best nights. I hope lots of voters in America agree. Katie, you're the pride of Middlebury, Connecticut and everyone back home is rooting for you. Unfortunately, the population of Middlebury only numbers 7,343. Hope they all have big text plans.

For the love of all that's right and professional, Kara, stop thinking with your vajajay when Casey performs! They should have called that song the Power of Lust. Simon was right on the money with his comments. Did nobody else notice that Casey totally skipped the difficult change in the song? Do we really need eye candy that much?

I was on the verge of liking Didi's interpretation of You're No Good, until she tipped the cutesy meter into sickening. One should not smile and look all coy when singing of heartbreak and betrayal. Who took her other sleeve?

Siobhan showed that she cannot only sing the hell out of just about any song, but that Sanjaya's hairstylist is also still with the show.

What did you think of Billboard #1 night?